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The other day I had lunch with a friend who I hadn't seen for a few months. She told me a story that is too good to be true. It's one of those, "it happened to a friend of a friend". But I don't mind spreading stories, even if they are apocryphal. Heck, might make it better. Maybe I could start up an urban legend, that would be cool. My friend claims that this happened to someone she knows. We'll call her friend, "Betty" for no particular reason. So, anyway, Betty was out walking her chihuahua in West Seattle, when suddenly, a coyote appeared from nowhere and snatched up her little doggie. Desperate to save her pooch, Betty pursued the coyote. She chased the coyote onto a neighboring lawn. Much to Betty's surprise an irate man came barreling out of the house, the grounds to which she had stumbled onto in her hot pursuit. The man began yelling at her to "get off [his] property". The irate man was none other than Eddie Vedder (who does have a home in West Seattle). Betty was hysterical by this point and tried to explain that she was merely trying to rescue her innocent pet from the slavering jaws of a wild coyote. Meanwhile, on a balcony up above, Eddie Vedder's girlfriend appeared, wearing a baseball cap, sunglasses (it was dark out) and carrying an umbrella (it wasn't raining). She proceeded to call the cops. Sadly, Betty never found her Chihuahua, who is presumed to be dead. And eaten. By coyotes. And it's all Eddie Vedder's fault. Tags: eddie vedder, killer coyotes
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A week and a half after the film festival has ended I've finally decided to complete my mini-reviews for the last two days of SIFF. The delay wasn't exactly unavoidable. However, in my defense, my laptop literally crashed and burned. Okay it didn't literally crash but it did literally burn. It's rather alarming to see smoke coming out of your computer, I can tell you. The electrical burning smell wasn't enjoyable either. Anyway... back to the fest. Overall, I thought it was a pretty good festival with far fewer parties and only a handful of truly terrible films. The worst thing about the fest is that I had to work so I didn't make it to as many screenings as I generally do. Also, most people had to pay for their drinks at the parties, which is a travesty, I tell ya. A travesty! Thank goodness I was a VIP so I got to drink as much booze as I could tolerate... for FREE! Huzzah! Garrison Keillor: The Man on the Radio in the Red Tennis Shoes (USA) 2008 ***Poorly made documentary about Garrison Keillor. The director seemed to have no idea how to assemble and edit footage. The film consisted of randomly put together clips of Garrison and Co. working on and performing his radio show, A Prairie Home Companion, interviews with Keillor and footage of the doc crew following Garrison around in his daily life. For me, what made the movie watchable is that I'm a fan of Garrison Keillor and his radio show. I used to listen to it every Saturday but somehow got out of the habit. I have a fond affection for the show and the man that created it. He's charming, funny and he has a beautiful radio voice. So, this movie was not torture to watch. Days and Clouds (Italy) 2007 **1/2Boring movie about a couple having financial problems. That was the entire plot. They have bills. They lose their house and they have to work for a living. You know, if I want to experience this all I have to do is live my own life I don't need to go watch a movie about it. Bottle Shock (USA) 2008 ***For some bizarre reason SIFF screened the closing night film on Saturday instead of Sunday. The closing night film is about the Judgement of Paris wine tasting in 1976 in which two California wines won the top prizes for whites and reds in a blind taste test. Apparently there's another film being made on the subject that sounds infinitely better and is based on the book written by Steven Spurrier, the British wine merchant who organized the 1976 tasting in Paris. Bottle Shock follows the story of the winemakers of Chateau Montelena, who created the winning Chardonnay in '76. It is obviously largely fictionalized and focuses on a stupid romantic triangle among the young (and supposed, I guess) "pretty people". I would have rather seen the real story of the California winemakers and the judges in Paris. But no, we get silly Hollywood bullshit instead. The film was attended by Bill Pullman and Freddy Rodriquez and I think a producer or something. Hey, it was over a week ago and I don't remember. Additional notes: Bill Pullman is still good looking and without a VIP lounge the closing night party was lame. Except for the free drinks. That was good. Bizarrely, Alan Rickman won the audience award for best actor at SIFF. He was the only decent part of Bottle Shock because he is Alan Rickman after all, but... the movie was lame. Whatever. Secret Festival #4 ***Straight from a famous film festival, the last entry was pretty good if viewed as a genre film. But it wasn't as good as it should have/could have been. Also, if the filmmaker was going for a "shocking twist" it sadly failed. I figured it out in the first five minutes. I think the director either should have been very clear about what was going on or better at hiding what was going on. The distinctive narrative style was marred by idiocy and/or trying to be too, too clever. If Tarantino had made this movie it would have been great. Towelhead (USA) 2007 **** Good adaptation of Alicia Erian's novel of the same name. Directed by Alan Ball of Six Feet Under fame. The plot follows the sexual awakening of a thirteen year old Arab-American living in Texas with her strict father during the Gulf War. Sure we've seen this story before.... about boys. This one is about a girl, which seemed to make some people uncomfortable. I thought it was brilliant with a stunning performance by Summer Bishil as the young girl. Total Movies seen: 84 Total bags of popcorn consumed: Um... not sure I lost track, must have been about four or five. And one Bagel dog! Free Booze at closing night party: A glass (well, plastic cup, really) of champagne and two Grey Goose vodka/tonics. *= Unclean, unclean
**= Crap, but doesn't make your eyes bleed
***= Watchable to good
****= Great
*****= Masterpiece/ClassicTags: movies, siff 2008
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Triangle (Hong Kong) 2007 ***Three great Hong Kong directors collaborated on this film- Tsui Hark, Ringo Lam and Johnnie To. The story is a continuous narrative and is told using the exquisite corpse method. The film, perhaps understandably, has a rather complex setup and didn't seem to flow together well. The last 30 minutes filmed by Johnnie To were the best. The look of the film and the cinematography were beautifully done. Sunrise (USA) 1927 *****Next we attended a presentation of F.W. Murnau's innovative expressionistic masterpiece, the Academy Award winning Sunrise. It was screened at the Triple Door with live musical accompaniment with an original score written and performed by The Album Leaf. Sunrise remains one of the most visually stunning films and the addition of The Album Leaf's ambient synthesized rock score enhanced the experience tremendously. Before I Forget (France) 2007 *This movie was almost unwatchable. Yet we stayed and watched the whole thing. Go figure. Directed by Jacques Nolot who previously made Porn Theater which was also a bad film, but made up for it by being pornographic. Before I Forget follows the life of an aging hustler living with HIV. It is told in long slow shots where nothing happens interspersed with boring conversations of the central character meeting up with other aging gigolos. It really wasn't very good. At most festival screenings Seattle audiences applaud politely even if the film is mediocre. When this film ended a few people applauded sarcastically in response to which everyone else laughed. It was the most amusing moment at the screening. Total Movies seen: 79 *= Unclean, unclean
**= Crap, but doesn't make your eyes bleed
***= Watchable to good
****= Great
*****= Masterpiece/ClassicTags: movies, siff 2008
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Vice (Russia) 2007 ***Denis is a successful DJ. He has a beautiful girlfriend. The only thing he doesn't have is money. Rather than letting his rich girlfriend borrow money from Daddy in order to prevent their eviction he gets involved in dealing drugs instead. Things do not go well for him. This movie has a distinctive if not original look to it, with super saturated colors and an aggressive editing style. It stars, Maxim Matveev as Denis. He bears a striking resemblance to Orlando Bloom and therefore has been dubbed by Lo & I as the "bargain basement Orly". This film is certainly watchable but nothing to write home about. Mysteries of Pittsburgh (USA) 2008 *1/2Stupid, bad, hateful movie about Art Bechstein, the son of a gangster who has just graduated from college and is hanging out with screwballs during his last summer before he has to begin his adult life with a real job. The only thing worth watching in this film is Nick Nolte as the schmuck's mobster dad and Mena Suvari as a vapid slut. Unfortunately they only have minor roles. Instead we're forced to follow Art and his friends, Sienna Miller, who cannot act and Peter Sarsgaard, who can act but he's awful in this film. There's only so much you can do with a lousy script. Written and directed by Rawson Marshall Thurber who previously directed Dodgeball. If that's not a ringing endorsement for this film, then I don't know what is. Alexander Nevsky (Soviet Union) 1938 ***** Then we ended the night with sublime perfection. This film is essentially a thinly veiled propaganda film about Russian hero Alexander Nevsky who defeated the Germans when they invaded Russia in the thirteenth century. Word to the wise: do not attempt to invade Russia- especially in the winter. You will get your ass kicked. Directed by legendary filmmaker, Sergei Eisenstein, who manages to raise this film from propaganda to art and tells a pretty good story with great style in the process. With Alexander Nevsky, Eisenstein created the first cinematic use of editing film to music. He collaborated with famed composer Sergei Prokofiev (Peter & the Wolf), who created the score to accompany the film. SIFF presented Nevsky at Benaroya Hall with live accompaniment of the Prokofiev score by the Seattle Symphony. This event was truly stunning. The moment at the end of the battle when the soldiers lay dead and dying on the battlefield while the soprano walks to center stage and sings a lament for them made my hairs stand on end. And for anyone who has seen this film... I have one thing to say: The helmets. The helmets are not to be missed. Total Movies seen: 76 *= Unclean, unclean
**= Crap, but doesn't make your eyes bleed
***= Watchable to good
****= Great
*****= Masterpiece/ClassicTags: movies, siff 2008
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Princess of the Sun (France) 2007 ***Mildly entertaining animated feature about young Prince Tutankhamen. Who knew the ancient Egyptians spoke in perfect French? Island of Lost Souls (Denmark) 2007 *****Three plucky kids must face an Evil Necromancer, a menacing scarecrow, ghostly possession and thousands of trapped souls. It's a perfect balance of action, comedy and story. One of the best of the fest. Surely a bad Hollywood remake cannot be far behind. Stranded: I've Come From a Plane that Crashed on the Mountains (France) 2007 ****In October 1972, a plane carrying a rugby team from Uruguay crashed in the Andes. Of the original 45 passengers, 16 managed to survive in spite of incredible hardship- snowstorms, cold, avalanches and lack of food. Famously or infamously the survivors resorted to cannibalism in order to survive. Thirty-five years later the survivors and their children visit the crash site. In interviews each survivor details the story of their miraculous survival. A fascinating and well done doc. Total Movies seen: 70 *= Unclean, unclean
**= Crap, but doesn't make your eyes bleed
***= Watchable to good
****= Great
*****= Masterpiece/ClassicTags: movies, siff 2008
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